A. It's customary for the mother of the bride to purchase her dress first. Her choice is meant to subtly dictate what the mother of the groom will wear. Since the Mother of the Bride needs to pay closer attention to her choice, she will go first. Most would advise the MOB/MOG to avoid dresses in the white, ivory, and champagne color family.
Q. When the mother of the bride buys her dress, is it her duty to then politely "inform" the groom's mother? What happens?
A. Old-school wedding etiquette says "yes." She is expected to notify the mother of the groom (presumably to prevent overdressing, clashing colors, and other fashion faux pas.) And while it's certainly good form, it's not a requirement, especially if you're worried about seeming pushy or bossy.
Q. What do I look for?
A. When you're the Mother of the Bride, you want to stand out and feel special, without upstaging your daughter. A 2-piece ensemble has a great style and sheen. Take off the jacket to look young and vibrant on the dance floor. This outfit would also be appropriate for the Mother of the Groom, or for a wedding guest to wear to a formal wedding.
Q. What about color?
A. Color is KEY. Think about this way…there will be a large family group photo. The bride and groom will be center, with the wedding party on both sides, all of which will be fashionable and coordinating. The fathers will be in suits or tuxes, so having the moms be in a color that CLASHES would be a HUGE mistake. The moms should pick a coordinating color and style that suits the “whole” look. Moms should NEVER shop for her gown without thinking of the whole picture. Navy, charcoal, pewter, copper, bronze, gold are examples of hues that are great for coordinating. You don’t want to match the bridesmaids, but an off-shoot of that color is perfect.
Q. What about Style?
A. Style is everything; the wedding is about image, so certainly the dress should be too. If at all possible, once you know the color, select a gown that is an expression of the event. Don’t wear a ball gown if the event doesn’t call for that..and even more, don’t wear short and sexy, deep cut necks, or deep cut backs, when the venue and event calls for a more conservative elegance. A jacketless dress could work in the right setting.
Q. Does the Mother of the Bride have to get dressed up for the wedding, even if fancy isn't her style?A. If it's an evening wedding, you're going to have to dress up more than usual. You don't want to stick out or appear disrespectful. But this doesn't mean you have to sport sequins and satin or velvet and rhinestones. There are many frill-free formal looks out there. Stick to your guns and you'll find an outfit (pants are okay!) that's unembellished, easy, and elegant -- perfect for your casual style.
Q. Can a young-looking MOB/MOG wear a strapless ball gown -- is there such a thing as looking too young or sexy?
A. On one level we think you deserve to wear a fabulously sexy dress, but on another, we're wondering how the bride will feel. If she's supportive, go for it -- you're both going to sizzle! But if your daughter seems concerned about you turning heads, not acting her/your age, and otherwise upstaging her, let her be selfish. It's her day, not yours. Besides, you're not limited to "frumpy" or overly conservative attire at all. It's quite possible to be glamorous without ruffling any feathers.
Gone are the stodgy old ideas about how a Mother of the Bride should dress.
Here are the Top 5 trends in Mother of the Bride Dresses that give us hope!
1) Bright Colors: It used to be that Mother of the Bride dresses only came in four colors: blah, boring, beige, and blech. Pastels and navy blue are only part of the selection nowadays! Finally, the industry is starting to show a spectrum of different colors, from spring greens to royal purples. Whether you love bold jewel tones or lean towards rich earth tones, there will be something out there for you. Since more saturated colors are better for aging, pale skin tones, liven up your look by choosing a color with some pizzazz!
2) Bolero Jackets: You may be sick of those boring Mother of the Bride jacket dresses, but the good news is there’s finally a fresh new take on them! Designers have addressed the Bolero jackets have style and need for a removable jacket to cover the arms that is also very fashionable. The bolero jacket, with different sleeve lengths, is in. It’s elegant and practical. Take it off when you’re hot, and you will still have a great dress underneath. Wear it to cover up during the ceremony – no one will guess you’re trying to cover those wobbly chicken wings under your arms!
3) Tiered Dresses and Skirts: Tiered skirts are showing up in stores this season and are especially appropriate for formal wear for the over-40 set. They’re modern and feminine and can be very flattering if they are not too frilly. Try one before you buy, and make sure it suits your body. With all that extra material, this Mother of the Bride style is not for everyone!
4) New Lengths: Say goodbye to floor length when it come to Mother of the Bride Dresses. Plenty of different hemlines are popping up, mainly due to the huge variety of different wedding styles and venues these days. We’re seeing plenty of cocktail-length, knee-length, and handkerchief hems, as well as hi-lo dress lengths. (High in the front, long in the back). At the knee, or slightly above the knee is as high as you want to go. Remember: All these new hemlines give you one more reason to wear some fabulous, head-turning shoes!
5) “Green”Fabrics ( no, we don’t mean color!): Environmentally responsible weddings are all the rage. Couples are using recycled materials for invitations and donating to charity instead of offering plastic, land-fill bound favors to their guests. The “green” theme even reaches all the way down to wedding attire. You may have to explore specialty stores, but organic cotton and silk dresses are growing in popularity. The best part about them is because the dresses are made with natural fibers, they are more comfortable and breathable. When you’re outside at an August wedding, you’ll appreciate why this is so necessary!
